People are taught, even directly advised, not to burden others with their problems. Then when tragedy happens people ask, “Why didn’t they talk to someone?”
We are taught to put on a smile to mask our sadness. Laughter to mask our pain. We are taught to show others what they need to see, to help them have a better day.
We are taught that everyone else has their own problems and shouldn’t be bothered with ours. We are taught to fool those we love into believing that we’re happy and content, so they won’t worry.
We are taught this through advice, the examples of others and life itself.
We are silenced and expected to stay that way. Present to the world a perfect life and everyone {except you} will be happy.
Then silence turns to darkness. Darkness turns to tragedy. People ask why. “How did this happen? They were so happy.” Were they? Or were they just taught to make you believe that they were?
How can we prevent tragedies if we push for silence? If we promote false advertising of ourselves through fake smiles and forced laughter? How can someone be helped when no one is able to see them?
Why do we ask people to speak up, then tell them that they shouldn’t? Or make them feel like a fool for doing so? Why do we offer them a shoulder, then trivialize their problem? Why do we tell people they are not alone, but then make them feel that they are?
Suffer in silence. This is what people are taught.
Then we ask why.
Me - Who am I? 
Good point – and for both genders, although for different reasons. Girls and women are always meant to think of others first, and smile. Boys and men are meant to never share their real feelings or be thought weak. Both are horrible ways to teach people how to be people.
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You are absolutely right. Both genders are taught this for different reasons and both can be terrible lessons to teach – especially in times of deep despair when being this way is the last thing they need.
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This is very good!! Something that needs attention called to, good post!
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Thank you very much for taking the time to read this. I do hope that more people will read it and then use it as a stepping stone toward teaching others to have a voice, rather than silence them.
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Thank you.
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You’re welcome.
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Oh wow, what an amazing post!!!
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Thank you and thank for dropping by to read it!
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I’ve wondered this. I’ve wondered, after a tragedy, when ‘we’ all say ‘we’ would have done something if we had known….would we have? Because those tragedies are still in the making today, and we will continue to ask, after they play out.
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Exactly. Would we? Or would we just brush it off as if it were exaggerated or unimportant? I think that although people ‘say’ they want to help, in reality they prefer to live in their ‘happy places’ and will do everything they can to remain there, even if that means ignoring important signs.
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A pertinent observation on one of life’s ironies this is. It also manifests in expressions such as ‘grin and bear it’, ‘taking it on the chin’ and the like, perhaps inspired by the philosophy of stoicism. May it be whatever, there is a felt need for realisation of the proverbial needle on the camel’s back to afford interactive social support systems where people can be either sustaining enablers or recuperative beneficiaries to ensure the way forward. With best wishes…
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Social support systems can help, but they can also destroy. Finding the right support is key. This is where I feel that most people hit the brick wall and lose hope. Unfortunately, sincere concern and help is not as easily found as we’d like to think. Perhaps we can begin to teach the art of caring, a bit better than what’s been taught to most. Thank you for your comment.
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Very thought provoking post. It’s true and we all do it at some point – put on a face or a mask. Here’s to living more authenticity in 2017.
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We certainly do, but we shouldn’t have to. To live a life where you are true to yourself is true living.
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Absolute beauty! Struck a chord with my train of thoughts, kuddos to the raw talent .❤
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Thank you! It’s nice to see that others understand this and think similarly. Thank you so much for dropping by and for commenting.
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Thank you!
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Great & Inspirational Post! Very Well-Written! Keep It Up! I enjoyed reading this so much! 🙂
(check out my blog – if you don’t mind – I’d really appreciate it) 😊❤️
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Thank you for your kind words and I am so glad that you enjoyed it. I’d be happy to check our your blog. 🙂
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It’s My Pleasure! Thankyou! 😊😊
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This is very sad but very true. Thanks for sharing 🙂
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Yes, I agree. You’re welcome and thank you so much for reading and commenting.
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No problem!
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