The other day, I was watching a video where people were speaking of how they remembered a woman who had recently died. From family to friends, everyone had their own words to describe her, but all of their words were more or less the same. It was apparent that they all knew this woman for who she was. She wasn’t a mystery.
As they spoke, the thought entered my mind, “What about when I die? There’s not many people who know the real me. The things they would say about me wouldn’t even be true.” I laughed at that thought, but it also greatly disturbed me.
Unlike the woman from the video, I am a mystery. Most people don’t realize it though. They think that who they see is the real me. To them, I’m quiet with a bland personality, have little emotions, no humorous side, and lead a rather boring existence. The words said at my funeral would cause people to leave thinking, “Wow, poor lady. She didn’t enjoy life at all.”
If I could attend my own funeral, it would be quite funny to listen to them because that’s not who I am. The real me is actually the opposite of all the characteristics listed above. It’s just that there are not many people who see that side. I can think of three. Three out of many.
Some call that pride, because I don’t want to embarrass myself. Others call it insecurity, and a few call it normal. Whatever the case may be, it takes a special bond for me to connect with others on that level; to be comfortable enough with them to be myself.
A few days ago I was talking to someone I barely know. But because they reminded me, both in appearance and mannerisms of one of the three people I mentioned above, I instantly felt comfortable with them. They saw me for me. It’s strange how that works, and I didn’t even realize it until later.
I wish that I was brave enough to show the real me to everyone, to have no inhibitions. Others do it and appear to have a grand time doing so. They’re not shy. They just live and enjoy every moment. That would be nice.
There have been several posts lately about how ‘people need to learn to live’ and ‘getting out of your comfort zone.’ Those are both true statements and I agree with them, but what people never tell us is how we’re supposed to do that.
How do you get out of your comfort zone, so that you can live? What causes some people to be free to live and others to be imprisoned by their own inhibitions?