Searching for Greener Grass?

grass

When relationships become difficult, and they all do at one point or another, instead of trying to work things out some people start looking elsewhere for fulfillment. They begin thinking that the grass may be greener on the other side.

For some, it is greener. But for many, if not most, the grass is only greener for a time. Then it too, will begin to develop a few brown spots here and there.

No grass is perfect.

Knowing this however, doesn’t stop people from looking. They still believe that when times get hard they can find the comfort and satisfaction that they’re missing, somewhere else. That the somewhere else will be problem free. It won’t.

But they let their emotions and the thrill of possibly having someone new in their life fool them. The beginning of any relationship is wonderful. Everything is new and they get to anticipate the “firsts” (first touch, first kiss, etc) all over again. It’s an exciting time.

However, after that first phase is over, phase two comes along. That is when everything slows down and becomes real. The blinders are taken off and suddenly Mr. or Mrs. Perfect isn’t so perfect anymore. Suddenly, they have flaws just like everyone else. The new grass isn’t so green after all.

When a person’s eyes begin to wander to other grass, they tend to forget about this second phase or pretend that it won’t happen. They only see and feel the here and now. They don’t stop to realize that eventually that new grass that they’ve run to will soon have brown spots of its own.

It’s then that people look back and sometimes regret their decision, but by then it’s often too late. Once a choice is made, it’s made. Therefore, make sure it’s the right one.

“You’ve made your bed, now lie in it.”

Relationships with great potential have been destroyed because of the couple’s unwillingness to work on problems as they arise. Every relationship will have issues, but it’s how we respond to them that matters. Do we run or do we stay and work on it?

Relationships weren’t meant to be thrown away at the first sign of trouble. They must be maintained and properly cared for. Grass must be watered in order to survive. Neglected grass with die. Relationships are no different.

Sometimes there’s a reason to run, but usually there are more reasons not to. Relationships are worth the work, time and attention. Life is too short to live with regrets.

The grass is always greener in the summer, but winter will come. ~ me


This post was inspired by a couple I know.

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8 Responses to Searching for Greener Grass?

  1. tric says:

    When I think of all the ups and downs my OH and I have shared it is hard to believe we made it though. It will be 25 years this August, and over thirty since we got together. Chemistry is still at play, but now we also have companionship, friendship and so many hard times shared. Despite this I don’t mind admiring the green grass, but I’ve no desire to move there.

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    • mewhoami says:

      Congrats on 25 years! That’s quite an accomplishment. I like how you mention friendship. I think that, along with communication, is one of the keys to a lasting marriage. It’s great that through the hard times and the good, that you’ve both held on.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. My husband and I survived a “straying to greener grass” a few years ago. It was a horrible time but now, we are so much better. Patrick Duffy (the actor) once compared a marriage to a roller coaster. If you can make it through the down times, the up times can be so much more fun.

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    • mewhoami says:

      I’m glad to hear that you guys made it through that rough patch. That would have been a very difficult thing to go through, but I’m sure that you’re both stronger now because of it. I agree with Patrick. The downs make the ups so much better.

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  3. I think too that as time goes on in a relationship you do get better at working on things (if you’re really interested in maintaining that relationship of course)….but you’re right…too much these days is viewed as disposable and too much work…..relationships are always going to be work…..but work that’s well worth doing in most cases.

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    • mewhoami says:

      You’re right about the people having to be willing. Some aren’t and some relationships were bad from the start. For the rest however, the years are what brings two people closer. You learn each other and with that you’re able to resolve conflicts easier and are happier in general. It’s certainly worth the effort.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Lovely post, and I hope that the couple that inspired it figure out how to fertilize their own yard and keep it green and weed free! Plus, love your quote at the end 🙂

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