Out of all the letters that can be written, a eulogy is normally the most sincere and heartfelt of them all. They speak of how much the deceased was cared for and loved. Of the many wonderful, funny, and sometimes embarrassing memories that were made over the years. They share how their words, life, and lessons have changed others, bettering them.
Eulogies describe just how special and unique a person was. About their victories, their amazing qualities and how they personally touched the world and those around them.
Sadly…
People put so much time and effort into writing a eulogy for someone who will never hear it.
Why do we wait until after a person is gone to write such a heartfelt letter? How much more would it mean if they were able to hear those words, now while they’re living? To hear just how special they are to you. How they’ve changed your life. How their words play in your head at just the right time. To hear about the silly memories that always bring you laughter. To hear all the many things that you love about them, all the many things that make them amazing in your eyes.
What makes us hesitant to share all of this with them while they’re still alive? Are we afraid of rejection, or of sounding too ‘mushy’? Do we assume that we’ll have time to tell them later? Are we just too busy?
We don’t have to wait until someone is gone to share how we feel about them. Why not write a eulogy to someone who is living? Imagine how special that would be for them to read. Imagine their smile, their joy and their appreciation in reading such beautiful, heartfelt words.
What you would write in a loved one’s eulogy if they were to pass away today? Think about it, write it, and deliver it…now while they’re still here to read it.
A living eulogy – what a special gift that would be.
“Cause I’ve lost loved ones in my life
Who never knew how much I loved them
Now I live with the regret
That my true feelings for them never were revealed”
~ If Tomorrow Never Comes – Garth Brooks
Me - Who am I? 
I once wrote a living eulogy to my grandmother when she was very ill. I didn’t get to meet her until I was a teenager and shortly after we met she started having strokes. I had only known her for about 4 years when I poured my heart out to her telling her how much meeting her meant to me. I was stationed overseas at the time and by the time the letter arrived she had passed away. I later learned that it was read aloud during her funeral. The first thing I asked was if they had read all of it or just portions. I often wonder where the letter ended up, which family member kept it. I was sad that she never got to hear how much she was loved.
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What a sweetheart you were to do that for her. You had the best intentions and I’m sure she would have loved reading about how much she meant to you. I hope that they did read the entire letter aloud. It probably would have a been wonderful for everyone to hear. You tried and that means so much.
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Good advice. I was fortunate to learn that knowing my sister was dying. Now I don’t hesitate. I only keep my mouth shut if they are making me a little nuts. You know how family can do that at times. 🙂
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You were given time that many people aren’t. I can only imagine how special that time must have been, although difficult I know. Even during my ‘mushy’ times, I don’t think I’ve ever laid out exactly how I feel about someone and how and why they are so special to me. Plan to change that though.
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I have let myself down. I have spent precious time stuck in depression–what a waste of time.
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But, you’ve learned from that and now you know to make the most of your time and to try your best not to let depression get in the way…right? Other people will benefit now from the lessons you’ve learned. There’s always a positive side.
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I so get and agree with this MeWhoAmI. I don’t understand the hesitation in telling people they mean something, that they make you laugh, that they are fantastic, that they “insert what they are to you”. Why don’t we say it? I try to …..
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I truly believe that most people don’t feel the liberty to share such deep thoughts with others. So many of us have been raised to be tough. Being ‘mushy’ completely goes against that.
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I have embraced a philosophy of telling my feelings, because it feels stronger to do so, than to not. I have begun to feel more cowardly if I don’t share my thoughts. Too often I have regretted NOT saying something than ever regretted saying something.
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You’ve got a great point there. It is definitely more cowardly to stay silent than to share. Plus people need us to speak up, or else how will they ever know? Time is too short to waste.
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Amen MeWhoAmI, Amen. I actually wrote 2 sentences to a post I never finished yet. One line was “I don’t want to die with words in my heart”. How sad would that be?
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That would be terribly sad, and I love that line. That is so fitting and such a good thing to remember.
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I totally agree- I tell the people I love how I feel about them, what makes them special- to the world, to me. Why wait? Great post
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That’s wonderful! It’s so important for them to hear. If we wait, we may never get the chance.
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It is good to say what you think, while you have time. Eulogies to the living. Exactly perfect post.
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I completely agree, as we never know how much time we will have. One second can change everything.
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