Have you ever been wrongly accused? How did it make you feel? People make the statement that we are innocent until proven guilty, but in reality it’s the opposite. Until we can prove our innocence, we our guilty before our accusers.
Whether it be a crime or a simple disagreement, many times we are guilty until proven innocent. Unfortunately, there are also times when there is no hope for us, no matter how much proof we present. Our accusers’ minds are already made up.
The first time I recall being accused for something I hadn’t done was in High School. As I was leaving one of my classes, my teacher ran out and abruptly stopped me in the hallway. Standing beside him was a fellow classmate, who had a very angry expression on his face. My teacher asked me why I had stolen the boy’s history book. He didn’t ask me if I did or even if I knew anything about it. He just accused me, right there on the spot.
For several minutes I stood there trying to defend myself, but to no avail. In their eyes, I was guilty. After being berated by my classmate, my teacher sternly ordered me to return the book immediately. It was a request that I would never be able to fulfill.
I left school that day hurt, angry and very offended. Stealing someone’s book or any item of theirs, is not something I would do. It wasn’t in my character to do such a thing, but regardless of the truth, I was guilty.
False accusations come in different forms as a person ages, but they still come. The worst of these accusations, are those that go directly against a person’s character. The times when a person’s true intentions are misinterpreted in a negative way.
Miscommunication is an open door for false accusations. Whether it be misinterpreted words or actions, people are wrongly accused every day and in a variety of situations. There is a reason why it is said that communication is key. People must learn to listen, more than they speak.
People should also learn to listen to others, more than they listen to the voice inside themselves. That is the voice that drowns out the person who is speaking. That is the voice that has already determined that the person is guilty. People should have an open mind to the possibility that they may be wrong.
Leaving no room for error, leaves no room for proper reconciliation.
Have you ever been wrongly accused?
Me - Who am I? 
The first time I remember being falsely accused, it was also about stealing. My brother had, and he hid the wrapper of the candy bar he had taken from my dad’s stash under MY pillow so I would get in trouble.
That pales in comparison to the accusations I hear all the time from anti-queer people, though. I get told that I’m a child molester, that I “recruit” people, that I “lead them astray,” that I am a rapist, that I am a sexual deviant, that I am a harmful influence… the list continues. It was so bad in college (in Idaho) that my professors and I would even joke about it, making “gay sign up sheets” for “recruiting” purposes and giggling over it.
That helped me heal a bit, and find the strength to be myself in the face of the baseless accusations. But yeah, it hurts like hell.
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That sounds like something my brother would do! Kids are too funny. Did you get him back?
I think when people don’t understand something, regardless of what it is, they become very critical. Sometimes even accusing them of something completely absurd. It is sad that people can’t see other people for who they are. Even if they don’t agree with someone’s choices, they should still love them and show them respect. No one should be treated badly because they live differently than someone else.
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I just got through a hearing at my school, total waste of time for a stupid mistake. Oh well I presented my case and got off scott-free.
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Good thing you got off free. That’s great. It wasn’t a complete waste of time then, especially of someone there learned something from it. You never know where a person’s life lessons will come from.
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I have been accused of many things at work – all totally incorrect. And I never, ever received an apology.
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That’s disappointing. I wonder what causes people to accuse, later be found wrong, and then walk away as if nothing happened. The least they could do is apologize. Pride. That usually stops them.
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I would say that is exactly what it was.
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I like your last paragraph. We do need to keep our mind open and quit listening to our voices which drown out the speaker’s. Great post! Oh…and as for being accused. When I was in grade school – 3rd grade? There were a bunch of us who walked home the same way. One day, a rock was thrown through the window of a business which was at the beginning of our route home. The principal called a meeting with us walkers and said he believed one of us threw a rock through the window. I spoke up and said that there were big kids walking through at the same time. He didn’t believe me. That was the last time I spoke up for myself, or for a group of innocents believed guilty — well, the last time for many, many years.
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That’s something I must continuously work on – not letting the voice inside drown out the speaker’s.Your story shows how important it is to let all sides state their case. By quieting us, they only show us that we don’t matter and neither do our words. It can hurt self esteem and not only that, the world needs people who will stand up for the truth. People should be heard.
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It gets even worse, when people get falsely accused of crimes they have not committed and end up in prison or without a job. I’ve seen a few cases like that. The most shocking is that false accusers get rarely punished. I wrote a brief post on that at http://otrazhenie.wordpress.com/2014/04/21/false-accusations-guilty-until-proven-innocent/ So sad 😦
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Yes it does. I’ll head over to read your post shortly.
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I’ve been wrongly accused several times in my life so far. As I’ve matured (grown old) I’ve learned to accept this flaw in others. But that first time still sticks with me. (If you want to delete the link, I’ll understand. It just tells my first encounter with being accused.)
http://speculationsimpressed.wordpress.com/2013/10/29/the-sixth-grade-villain/
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A flaw in others – that’s right. We can’t fix their thinking, but we can overlook it. Now you’ve got me curious.Thank you for the link.
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Great post; and yes, more times than I can count. I used to get sick to my stomach when it would happen……i’m getting closer to a point in life where I no longer give an F. It hurts, sure…. but I’m starting to realize that at a certain point I’ve got to live my life independent of what other people say about me.
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We can’t live our life expecting everyone to like us, agree with us, or even to have the right perception of us. That’s a part of life unfortunately. However, overlooking it, especially when it comes from loved ones, can be much easier said than done.
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Let’s try an experiment: I don’t believe that we are in a Global warming period and I don’t believe that if we were in it it was caused by humanity. Is anybody ready to discuss it calmly and logically?.
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I believe that is a false accusation also. I agree with you.
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Yes and the person who accused me was someone I thought knew me better than that. It hurt a great deal and even after they apologized I couldn’t remain friends, they should have know I wouldn’t have done what they thought.
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That would hurt. I think those instances are the worst of all. Those are the people that should stand beside you, not accuse you. Those are the ones who are supposed to know us the best.
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I still find it hard to accept that they would understand so little of my character after knowing for so long but I suppose it is one of those life lessons we all learn at some point.
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