Chasing Love Across the Globe

globeWould you leave everything you know and move across the globe for the sake of love? Speaking with a woman the other day, she told me of how she met her husband through an acquaintance of hers. They lived in different countries at the time, so their relationship was mainly built upon the letters exchanged between them. After only six months, never having seen each other but in pictures, she left her home country and headed to America to be with him.

When she left, she was only 22 years old. Leaving everything behind that she had ever known, including her entire family, she ventured off to make a life with someone she barely knew. With very little understanding of the English language, she put her entire trust in that man to take care of her. Thankfully he did, and after 21 years he’s still taking care of her. They now have three beautiful children and have made a wonderful life together.

From an outsider’s point of view, she was very courageous in making that move. Marrying anyone can be risky, but nothing compared to that of marrying someone you hardly know and who lives across the globe. Perhaps this is so hard for me to understand because I grew up not trusting men. I didn’t trust them as far as I could throw them. This woman on the other hand, put her entire life in a stranger’s hands. A man’s hands. That is terrifying to me. That decision could have ended very badly. Fortunately in her case, it turned out quite well.

Anyone who has been in more than one relationship, has surely felt pain. But does a person experience so much pain, that they must look outside of their own country for love? Ironically, a man last night answered that for me. In conversation, he spoke of how a woman had caused him so much hurt, that he is now completely fed up with American women. He’s vowed to himself, that if he is ever to marry again, it will be with someone from a different country.

What would make him say such a thing? There are plenty of good American women. However, to be fair I must also consider his point of view. Some women here can be tough, selfish, bossy, and downright mean toward their spouses. I’ve seen them first hand. I realize that this happens everywhere, but it seems to be more prevalent here. Often times, in other countries, women seem to have more respect for their husbands, put their families first, cherish their time together and work to make their home a peaceful place full of love and laughter.

I’ve also run into plenty of men here who have no concern for their spouse or their children. Again, this does not apply to every man and can happen anywhere. In fact, I’ve experienced this the hard way with someone from another country. Even so, after speaking with men from various places such as Nepal, Africa, Haiti and India (just to name a few), I’ve learned that they typically put their families before everything. They are kind and loving to their children and spend quality time with their family each day. They also work to support their families, but unlike many Americans, they don’t work 3 jobs to make that extra dollar. That’s not because they don’t need to. I’m sure they could use the additional cash. It’s because they value their family more than they do money.

In summary, this really isn’t about people from specific places. There are both good and bad people everywhere. This is more about the values and morals that are steadily being lost in this country. It saddens me. This is not the world in which I grew up in. People cause so much hurt to their fellow man without a second thought. Should it be surprise then that people believe that they must look somewhere else just to find love? No. But, they shouldn’t need to. Love and true companionship should be easy to find wherever you are.

The fact is, there are millions of good catches both here in America and everywhere else. People who will love you and treat you right. They’re just not as easy to find these days.

Why do you think that people journey across the globe in search of love, and would you?

(This post has been edited. The original was not worded in a way that sat well with me, so it has been revised to add clarity and to clear up any potential misunderstandings.)

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18 Responses to Chasing Love Across the Globe

  1. Cindi says:

    Yes I would … and I did! I moved a quarter way around the world (from the US East Coast to the West Coast of Norway) when I found love a second time.

    Liked by 1 person

    • mewhoami says:

      That is neat and intriguing. To move across the world for someone is rare, and I imagine it makes for a fascinating love story.

      Like

      • Cindi says:

        It hasn’t been easy, but the rewarding times make it worthwhile. Trips back to the US to see extended family (and my adult daughters) are essential.

        There are many similarities between the Norwegian family culture and the American family culture I was raised in (60’s and 70’s), and my first husband and I raised our daughters in (80’s and 90’s) – and (referencing your excellent post above) family dinners were an integral part of that. But politically and socially, Norwegians work for the betterment of ALL and work together to achieve that – equal rights for women is a given – everyone is entitled to health care and education – no one will go bankrupt because of illness or going to school to prepare for their future. My observation is it enables families to enjoy life without those clouds hanging over their lives and work.

        Oops, I think I got off on a little tangent there!

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        • mewhoami says:

          Cindi,
          I like the idea of everyone working together as a whole to better a country and the life of it’s residents. Personally, I think that it wonderful that you have been given the chance to spend so much of your life in a country that you love and appreciate.

          Like

  2. April says:

    Nope. That would require travelling across the ocean. But I found my love in America, 27 year ago,

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  3. I would travel to Scotland to marry Scotch!

    Like

  4. tric says:

    I moved outside of Dublin. Trust me to a Dubliner those who live “down the country” are alien beings. I don’t think you can identify a whole nation of many millions as Americans and brand them all the same, it doesn’t make sense really. If he is let down again will he give up on women?

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    • mewhoami says:

      I agree. A whole nation cannot be defined be a group. However, I suppose if you are burned too much then it would be somewhat natural to want look somewhere else. I think he probably would give up entirely if it were to ever happen again.

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  5. suzjones says:

    I think there are people out there everywhere who are either bossy and headstrong or family oriented. I don’t think a particular race has anything to do with it. My first husband was abusive and domineering but my the love of my life now is generous, selfless and very family oriented. We’ve been together for 17 years;. Having been burned badly the first time, I’m not sure that I would travel across the world to marry someone sight unseen though 😦

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    • mewhoami says:

      You’re right. This wasn’t pointed towards a race. It was more so directed towards the mind set we have here in America. It’s not the same mind set, with the same values and morals I had when growing up. Times have changed. It’s wonderful that you found your love. I don’t think I would travel across the world either. That’s a bit too risky for me.

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  6. Glynis Jolly says:

    I’m not going to answer the question you asked but I will agree with you about how Americans act as a group. Of course, there are individuals that are not rude, selfish and gruel, but they are in the minority. I spend 2 years in Greece with my husband (also American) and saw the difference between the people there and those of us here in the states. My dream is to live in Europe once again because of what I experienced when I was there before.

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    • mewhoami says:

      Exactly. There are millions of wonderful people in America. It’s just that they are hard to find. I miss the morals and values that people used to have here. What a neat opportunity you had to spend so much time in Greece and to experience their culture. I imagine it is a fabulous place.

      Like

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