His First Birthday Away – Honoring a Good Man

When he went to sleep, I knew in my heart that he would never wake again. Heartbroken, I said goodbye. Now he is gone, but he is certainly not forgotten. Today on his birthday, he is not here to share it with us. But, he is in our hearts.

My step-dad taught me many things growing up. How to change a flat tire and how to change the oil in my car. He taught me that a good man will come to the door when he picks up a lady, instead of sitting in his car honking the horn. He taught me how to respect my elders and how to listen before speaking. He taught me how to fish and he taught me that I can accomplish anything.

He also showed me how gullible I can be. Watching football one day he said, “Do you see those dark glasses {eye shields} the players are wearing?…Those are the blind players.” I believed him.

The 22 years he was in my life were not always easy. At first I didn’t even want him around. I was only 10 at the time and I wanted my Mom all to myself. She had other plans though and I, nor anyone else, could stop their love from forming. She needed him and he her. They were a perfect match. They still are.

Over the years I grew to like him and then to love him. He may never know how much I loved him and still love him now. But, I think he does. During his final days, there was so much said between us. Much was unspoken, but the love and endearment could not be denied.

I miss him.

One thing I have learned through all of this, is that death is personal. Everyone feels it differently. When you cry at night, no one knows. When a memory makes you smile, no one knows. It’s all very personal.

I love him.

He may be gone from here, but his lessons, his love and the memories we made as a family will go on.

“A life of short duration could be so rich in joy and love that it could contain more meaning than a life lasting eighty years.”
― Viktor E. Frankl